Making
New Year’s resolutions appears to have gone out of fashion – people tried it
and it was too hard. However, change (and for the better) seems to be on
everyone’s agenda. So many were looking forward to saying ‘goodbye’ to 2016 and
are looking for positive ways to tackle 2017. There has been a great emphasis
on authenticity and transparency. The recent trend of no makeup selfies
seems to be a visual demonstration of this desire for authenticity. At the
beginning of the year Susanna Reid, followed this trend and posted comparison
selfies on Instagram at the beginning of the year. In one she is ‘TV ready’
with full makeup and in the other she is ‘Susanna in real life’ – no makeup. She
then wished people a ‘Happy Being You Year’.
What
does the real you look like? I don’t really mean without physical makeup. The
truth is that we all put on a non-physical kind of make-up to portray who we
wish to be, or who we perceive others think we should be. This may affect how
we look, but it has an even greater internal impact. For me it is about which
voices I choose to listen to. There are so many voices vying for my attention.
If I listen to the voices of the past I am paralysed in the present and if I
focus on the future it is hard to move forwards.
There is a constant internal battle going on which questions
my ability to make progress. This didn’t start when I started writing; it’s
been going on for years and in different areas of my life. Everyday, and
definitely more than once, I have to talk to myself to keep going in a positive
direction. Sometimes it is exhausting.
About six months ago I started creating an inspiration wall
in the room I now write in. On the wall I put up pictures, quotations, anything
that would encourage me to keep going rather than give up. My New Year’s
resolution started in September and I am not giving up. I am going to continue
to cultivate that positive voice.
This Christmas was difficult. It felt like I ran into a
number of ‘old voices’ some that I thought I could easily ‘shout’ over, but it
turns out words still hurt. I feel mentally as though as I have had flu;
drained and washed out. I am over the worst but it is a struggle to keep going,
I am lacking the energy and inclination to do so.
What holds us back from keeping our resolutions? Probably a
number of things:
- The reward to complete it is not as great as the current situation
- Lack of self-belief
- The wrong voice talking more loudly or more frequently
- The wrong voice was what started this – it is the wrong goal
- The trigger to get started is missing
And when it goes wrong, we assume THIS IS FAILURE. It is
not. We can be our own worst critics. One of the things I have started to tell
myself is, ‘trying is not failing’. New Years are annual – obviously, but
resolutions don’t have to be. Everyday begins anew, a fresh start, a chance to
try again
One of my favourite quotations on my inspiration wall is: ‘Put
your big girl panties on, cowboy up and get the job done. No one else will do
it for you.’ I’m not quite sure why, but when I read it I smile, it cuts
through the crap going round and round in my head and I get to start again.
What are your New Year resolutions?
What ways have you found to silence the voices?
What encourages or inspires you to keep going?
