Realignment

Having spent a lot of time on our sofa this week, I ended up watching a number of films. One of which was The Emperor’s Club. This is set in a boys’ boarding school and focuses on the lessons between a particular class and their teacher of ancient history. The teacher seeks to inspire the boys through the actions and words of Greek and Roman leaders. One boy who is more interested in making the boys laugh rather than learning refuses to be swayed by the teacher’s attention and enthusiasm. When the teacher meets with the boy’s father, the father asks, what is the point of teaching these ancient accounts? The teacher responds by talking about virtues and wanting to mould the lives of his students. The father is unimpressed.

 I think the idea behind the teacher’s efforts could be summed up by Aristotle’s words: “Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all.” Whether or not we are teachers, we all influence others by the way we live. This gives us great power and one might argue responsibility, to teach well.

Beliefs, words and actions that are aligned are powerful tools. To bring about real and lasting change all three must be in agreement. It is not to say that progress cannot be made without alignment. So often change begins as a thought or a word that is not truly believed and so behavioural changes rarely last. I was listening to a conversation between two comedians on a podcast. They were discussing being vegan. Whilst one could understand the other’s argument about why he should become vegan, he could not fully give himself to the change in lifestyle that this would require. The compassion he felt for the cows was not equal to the compassion he feels for himself in eating a cheese toastie. I am not vegan or judging him. It was just an interesting example, to see that the vegan’s arguments were accepted but this was not enough to affect behaviour.

Changing a lifestyle demands self-awareness and a kindness to oneself. Brutal honesty reveals the true outlook and kindness needs to be applied to help smooth the path of change. I have been through a process of looking backwards in order to see why current feelings and responses to situations occur. Some reflections have been painful, but it was also surprising to discover hidden beauty. It was these hidden, forgotten moments that allowed me to realign my beliefs. This is turn meant I was able to speak different words and act in new ways. The result was amazing and the impact beyond what I could have imagined. The situation involves others and is the reason I am not being more specific in my explanation.

A different, less successful example has been with my writing habits. A mentor recently recommended having five tasks to complete everyday. These should be achievable without specific word limits or timings. The overall goal is to complete five steps that move your writing (or other projects) forwards on a daily basis. I dutifully wrote my five tasks down and pinned them to my notice board. Three out of the five have been completed regularly and the fourth most days, but one task continues to elude me. Having spent a little time reviewing this process I have come to the conclusion that failure to complete the fifth task is because I do not fully believe I can do it. The fear of getting it wrong is still holding me back. Until I face the fear and move on in self belief progress will be slow. That is my challenge to work on my beliefs so that I can achieve some forward momentum with this task.