Last Autumn I wrote about
the Danish concept of hygge. This Spring I have been introduced to the Danish
concept of lykke.
I had the pleasure going
on a family city break to Copenhagen last month. At the back of my brain somewhere was the idea that Denmark was one of the happiest places to live, along with
the rest of Scandinavia. It was not something I had given much thought to
before our trip. I was expecting it to be clean, but somehow seeing litterless
streets and pristine underground stations was still surprising. What surprised
me more was the attitude of the people travelling. One our first activities as
a family in Copenhagen was going on a boat tour of the canals. We were
travelling in a big cumbersome people-carrier of a boat whilst other smaller
boats gave way to us, waving and smiling as they did so. Waving was quite a
feature of the trip – not just kids and not just other tourists either. The
waves were accompanied with smiles, and we all know that smiling is contagious.
So there we were sitting in the sun, moving on the water being welcomed by the
locals and experiencing some proper Danish lykke.
Lykke translates as
happiness. Happiness often feels fleeting and is a reaction or response to
something or someone. It seems that Happiness is something that happens to me. Aristotle said, 'Happiness depends on ourselves' - so I have been
thinking about how to create moments of
lykke in the everyday.
I’m not sure if it counts as lykke but one of
the lasting impressions I had from our visit to Copenhagen was people’s attitude when travelling. We
travelled on foot, by boat, on the underground and by train. It wasn’t until a
later conversation that I realised everyone had a very relaxed ‘live and let
live’ attitude to moving around and getting from one place to another. The
doors of the underground train would open and the people wanting to get on,
waited. This was not waiting with gritted teeth and rolling eyes. People
weren’t tensed hoping for any small gap in the flow of travellers to make their
move. It happened crossing the road too. Gestures of 'thanks' or 'go ahead' were
lacking but so was impatience or the entitled sense that this was somebody
else’s right of way and not yours.
I’ve checked, and all is
not perfect in Denmark – road rage does exist and it is on the rise. I
realise my own experience of travelling in Copenhagen was brief and limited but it did get me thinking.
I have had reason to do a
fair amount of motorway driving in the last month. I did not need to arrive for
a strict deadline but that did not prevent frustration and rage welling up when
observing people who cannot drive on a four-lane motorway. Although I enjoy
driving, I do find myself easily frustrated and angered by fellow motorists who
don’t seem to take others into consideration. This is particularly true if I am
running late! I don’t want this to be the case. I would like to adopt a ‘live
and let live’ approach to driving. Rather than judging mums for parking on the
squiggly lines outside of a school, I’d like to be more empathic and patient. I
am consciously trying to leave a little earlier for journeys and try and be
more patient in my attitude – some days are easier than others!
It’s much easier to be
present when you are away from home. Tasks and chores fade into the background.
I know there are various books that give advice about how to be present whilst
doing chores but I find it difficult to remember both the chore and the
conscious thought to be present! Instead I am trying to engage with activities
that cause me to be slower. I’ve been choosing to sit for a few minutes in the
garden (without listing all the gardening jobs that need my attention). I’m
also consciously trying to engage all my senses when I am in a new place. Even
if there is nothing of note, the process is a calming one. I’ve even done a bit
of cycling (highly recommended in The Little Book of Lykke by Meik Wiking.)Take a moment, and bring on the lykke!
What choices do you make
to bring a bit more happiness into your life?
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