Living in Wonder

For men were first led to study philosophy, as indeed they are today, by wonder.
(Aristotle, Metaphysics 982b, tr. A.E. Taylor)

For Aristotle, this kind of wonder was a feeling of being perplexed, a questioning that would lead to knowledge and wisdom. I like this kind of wonder, that causes questions and inquiry. It can lead to experiments, creativity and innovation. It can be the spark that generates great ideas, new ways of thinking and living.

More recently I have been taken with a different kind of wonder. The kind that makes you pause, sit up and say ‘Wow.’ The kind that is so often associated with children when they discover something new. Their eyes are transfixed; some kind of miracle has occurred and they delight in being part of this experience.

It has been one of those weeks that has found me grumbling about a variety of things. A friend of mine was out and about exploring new places in her local area. She said, ‘When you are looking for goodness you see it everywhere.’ When I read my friend’s thoughts it made me think, what am I looking for? It’s so much easier to grumble or complain, but what do I miss when I am focused on the negative?

Wonder is associated with childlikeness and perhaps seen as a bit naïve, but wonder can have a transformative effect. It allows us to be fully present – we are lost in the moment of awe and admiration. We allow ourselves to be fully there not worrying about the future or dwelling on the past.

Sitting in the shade in a friend’s garden, someone commented about the birds overhead. As we looked up, we saw birds of prey soaring above us. It was an opportunity to marvel at the gift of flight, freedom, the beauty of their wing spans and the majesty of their ascension. Our senses were captivated and our vision expanded. Wonder invites us to look beyond ourselves.

Most dictionary definitions include the word astonishment in their explanations. Whilst this is true, wonder can be broader than those sights that make us gasp. It can be noticing the detail of the everyday. Observing something new about an item that we have previously failed to see. It doesn’t have to be within nature, although that is an obvious place to look. I am enjoying particular lines in the novel I am reading. The images that are conjured up by just one line of well crafted words. I read them again. It brings enjoyment and inspiration.

The heat and sunshine call for us to slow down. It is the perfect opportunity to change perspective. To consider what we are looking for and how we are looking at what is before us. There is an invitation to look a little closer, a little deeper, for a little longer and embrace the now of wonder.

Happiness - Danish Style

Last Autumn I wrote about the Danish concept of hygge. This Spring I have been introduced to the Danish concept of lykke.

I had the pleasure going on a family city break to Copenhagen last month. At the back of my brain somewhere was the idea that Denmark was one of the happiest places to live, along with the rest of Scandinavia. It was not something I had given much thought to before our trip. I was expecting it to be clean, but somehow seeing litterless streets and pristine underground stations was still surprising. What surprised me more was the attitude of the people travelling. One our first activities as a family in Copenhagen was going on a boat tour of the canals. We were travelling in a big cumbersome people-carrier of a boat whilst other smaller boats gave way to us, waving and smiling as they did so. Waving was quite a feature of the trip – not just kids and not just other tourists either. The waves were accompanied with smiles, and we all know that smiling is contagious. So there we were sitting in the sun, moving on the water being welcomed by the locals and experiencing some proper Danish lykke.

Lykke translates as happiness. Happiness often feels fleeting and is a reaction or response to something or someone. It seems that Happiness is something that happens to me. Aristotle said, 'Happiness depends on ourselves' - so I have been thinking about how to create moments of lykke in the everyday.

I’m not sure if it counts as lykke but one of the lasting impressions I had from our visit to Copenhagen was people’s attitude when travelling. We travelled on foot, by boat, on the underground and by train. It wasn’t until a later conversation that I realised everyone had a very relaxed ‘live and let live’ attitude to moving around and getting from one place to another. The doors of the underground train would open and the people wanting to get on, waited. This was not waiting with gritted teeth and rolling eyes. People weren’t tensed hoping for any small gap in the flow of travellers to make their move. It happened crossing the road too. Gestures of 'thanks' or 'go ahead' were lacking but so was impatience or the entitled sense that this was somebody else’s right of way and not yours.

I’ve checked, and all is not perfect in Denmark – road rage does exist and it is on the rise. I realise my own experience of travelling in Copenhagen was brief and limited but it did get me thinking.

I have had reason to do a fair amount of motorway driving in the last month. I did not need to arrive for a strict deadline but that did not prevent frustration and rage welling up when observing people who cannot drive on a four-lane motorway. Although I enjoy driving, I do find myself easily frustrated and angered by fellow motorists who don’t seem to take others into consideration. This is particularly true if I am running late! I don’t want this to be the case. I would like to adopt a ‘live and let live’ approach to driving. Rather than judging mums for parking on the squiggly lines outside of a school, I’d like to be more empathic and patient. I am consciously trying to leave a little earlier for journeys and try and be more patient in my attitude – some days are easier than others!

It’s much easier to be present when you are away from home. Tasks and chores fade into the background. I know there are various books that give advice about how to be present whilst doing chores but I find it difficult to remember both the chore and the conscious thought to be present! Instead I am trying to engage with activities that cause me to be slower. I’ve been choosing to sit for a few minutes in the garden (without listing all the gardening jobs that need my attention). I’m also consciously trying to engage all my senses when I am in a new place. Even if there is nothing of note, the process is a calming one. I’ve even done a bit of cycling (highly recommended in The Little Book of Lykke by Meik Wiking.)Take a moment, and bring on the lykke!

 What choices do you make to bring a bit more happiness into your life?

The Present: A Gift to Yourself

Holidays are a great opportunity to slow down, to take some time out. It is a chance to try new things and visit new places.

Once at our holiday destination no transport was used. Walking is a great way to slow down and take notice of ordinary life going on around you. Thanks to an app, we discovered that we walked on average about 6km a day. This is far more walking than I would do at home. At first my legs did not like the change, but after a few days the aches were gone and I was enjoying navigating my way around the ancient and modern parts of Edinburgh. I have promised myself that walking is going to be more of a habit now we are home. The distances have not been so significant, but choosing to walk is slowly becoming more of a habit. It has made me more aware of the environment I am travelling in and given me a greater appreciation of my feet and legs!!

Walking is a great way of people-watching in a city and listening into conversation. For fun I decided to listen out for snatches of conversation and record them. The process of slowing down, of listening out and looking around inspires creativity. It increases an awareness of others which in turn develops empathy and compassion.

The choice to be more aware of the present moment is available at any time. It is not just for holidays. Taking a moment to stop and use a different sense is relaxing. Somehow it brings both focus and a sense of appreciation for the more ordinary things in life. It doesn’t require a great deal of time, but choosing to be present, to observe, listen, smell, touch or taste can change our perspective. Moments can be savoured or pass us by. Our choices and attitude determine which will happen more often. If you’re asking yourself when? The answer is now. Stop and be still, just for a moment. What can you hear, see, feel, smell or even taste that makes you glad to be alive right now?

Just for fun, I decided to compile the sentences that I recorded when I was out listening on the streets of Edinburgh. They appear in their sentences exactly how I heard them, but each new line represents a different snippet of conversation. I have imagined a conversation between two people:

You’re looking very fit

What did you do with your bag?

I forget. I don’t know.

It’s got your name on it you prick

Do you want to walk up through the graveyard?

I just don’t want to be seen in public with you

What’s wrong?

I used the baked bean tin with the string to murder someone

Ooh dear

It’s Keith. No one’s going to run me over

I’m sure we can figure it out

A lot of girls do

She swore after the first one that she wouldn’t do it again, but she did

We were talking about strangers

I’ve never asked you what your PHD project is about

I’m only here for three days

Perfect

It’s eight o’clock

I can recommend a show

He doesn’t think he’ll make it through the show without a beer

They’ve been on the road for two months now

Anything interesting happen?

Mushrooms, ham, olives

She knows

Jealous? I just can’t feel like that.

I heard her say that.

She’s got about four GCSE’s

Why is she paid so much?

I agree, it looks bad

We’ll start a revolution.

Full face masks

Oh, is that how it works?

I’m not allowed to tell you why that will be important later

That was amazing

You’ve got to get your timing right